Sunday, April 15, 2012

Mountain Tops and Valleys

I find that so many people tell me how they don't understand why bad things happen to some people. Why do some people go through illness or loss of a loved one and yet others seem to live that perfect all amercian dream?  I won't lie, there was a moment in time after Tasia was diagnosed that I was angry asking why? Telling God that this wasn't what I had planned. I told him that I couldn't stand by and watch my child suffer or live in fear that I may be a widow in my twentys. There was the moment when I realized that I was one of those "hospital mom's" and that my life would likely be spent in fear of "what if".

But I got to the point when I had to shake all of that off. Quit crying about what was and focus on what could be. I had to realize that I was given a gift to walk the most beautiful people in my life through the hardest journey and the biggest valley of their lives. And not just walk with them and beside them but help them climb out of it.


 For 13 years I have researched and prayed my way to an answer for my family. For 13 years I have kept hope alive in my heart. And Tasia is now through the wilderness and climbing her way to the top. And exactly 14 years (to the day) that Isaac and I met, I get to stand beside him as he steps out into a life where pain does not live as he makes his ascent to the top.

 Yes, there have been very difficult moments throughout the last 13-14 years but I wouldn't trade the valley we have walked through for all the money in the world because I get to stand on the mountain tops with my beautiful husband and children and look where God has brought us to. This is a higher moutain top with a better view than I could have ever dreamed of.  Nothing can compare to this victory in our lives! Yes, we walked and will walk through the valley's of the shadow of death but God is bringing us to a place that can only be seen after crossing through that dark valley. We have to cross into this valley again on June 4th but I know what lies beyond is better than our wildest dreams could imagine.

 I know that He will be with us again through every step of it.

(all image credits via weheartit)
Today I find myself at peace with the valleys so that I can truly appreciate the mountain tops.

XOXO,
Jillian

This post is dedicated my family, Malkie, Kristen, Rachel, Beth, Michelle, Scott, and Whitney who have found themselves in the valley and chosen to climb up and out or are on there way to the top. And to all of the families who find themselves in the valleys and are looking for the path that leads upward. He see's your pain and He will lead you through if you just trust Him.