Thursday, April 19, 2012


This morning I woke up and realized...
 Oh my gosh!!! We are going to be doing this again in just a little over a month! 

Isaac, my husband,  will be having the same surgery on June 4th. I know it's the right thing but wow does it feel overwhelming at times.  When I start to feel like this I remind myself of how God has taken such good care of us. I remind myself to put the burden on Him instead of us because He cares so deeply.  I honestly don't remember what I have told you all and what I haven't about this situation.  When we arrived in March to Minnesota for the surgery "evaluation" and 4 days later my husband was headed back on a plane to CO, I was sitting in a hotel room starring out the window thinking how HUGE this situation was. At that point in our journey I thought I was going to be facing this surgery with my daughter alone.


That is such an intense word to me.


 Normally when thinking of that word I would think of it meaning a very dark and loney time. But I was far from ALONE. I remember sitting there and just telling God that this situation felt so enourmous that I couldn't even wrap my brain around it and yet I knew... it was right. I remember so clearly just throwing up my hands and telling Him that He was gonna have to handle this because ALONE in my strength I knew it was impossible. I knew that emotionally I would crumble under the pressure. That day I literally just gave it to Him. Whole heartedly gave it to Him. I spent my days enjoying my daughter and drinking in every happy smile, every elevator dance (yes, we dance in elevators - hee hee), every laugh, every quiet moment because I wasn't sure when I would get to see those beautiful moments again. All I knew was, major life saving/changing surgery = vent, pain, tears and very long time of healing.

I told God everyday that I knew that He could do the impossible. He could give us better than the best case scenario! That week in prayer my mother in law felt like God told her that Tasia's recovery would be REMARKABLE (that's a whole other post i still have to write). She wrote me an email and told me this and even included the definiton of remarkable. I told Tasia this and we prepared our hearts for the possibility of something better than expected. We had nothing really in mind because sometimes I think making a plan in our heads just puts God in a box.  I knew the power of God was going to be at work. I knew that I could count Him faithful to fulfill His word. I stood on that.

Looking back it's amazing to see how we were anything but ALONE. Not only did He orchestrate everything so that my husband and mother in law could be there for the days surrounding surgery but He brought me all of YOU, dear readers! YOU have given me strength too! From emails, letters, texts, calls, FB messages, packages and prayers. I have never felt such love and support in my entire life!  And even if we would have walked into that surgery without our family or all of you supporting us, Tasia and I would not have walked into it ALONE.

We walked in as daughters of the most high God.
We walked in with the angels of Heaven surrounding us.
 We walked in with the Prince Of Peace.

There is no such thing as ALONE in this world unless you choose to be ALONE.
As you all know by now, God was most present in our time of need. He never left us. He never will.
So as we make our way closer towards the next surgery date. I am reminded that we will not be going into this


And with that I am comforted.