Sometimes it is so hard to trust that everything is going to be okay. Normally I'm a glass half full type of girl but hearing the news of DENIED for Tasia's transplant evaluation on Friday was a bit too much. I cried half the weekend away. Seriously folks. Seriously I did. I stood looking at valentines for my kids at the store bawling my eyes out.
"Yes, yes.... this card is perfect. This one... this one says it all."
Sob sob sob
Then I would look at the person next to me and assure them I am alright. This went on for about 30 minutes.
What can I say, I'm a bit emotional and I put all my heart into everything -even picking out greeting cards.
The fact that I was so emotional wasn't really because I took this no as a final say, (I'm a fighter when it comes to my families health and don't take no easily). It's because this whole situation is hard enough without having to constantly fight for the best care possible. This is a child's life we are talking about! It's not that tough to just do the dang paperwork. Well today she woke up feeling yucky so before I went in to the office I ran by her pediatricians office to have her checked out. She has an ear infection and he called her in some new pain meds for the rough days. But the fact of getting her all fixed up with some antibiotics and all she needed was not what made this appointment such a good one. Dr. Pediatrician asked me how things we going with the transplant referral and I broke down and told him they weren't going well at all.
Again, sob sob sob.
(and that is sob as in "sobbing" not son of a bi-otch btw)
Upon hearing this and seeing my sob sob sobbing, his assistant jumped on the phone with the "other" assistant who denied the referral and well, lets just say it wasn't a calm, happy conversation.
I did a little happy dance in my head - hee hee.
Then Dr Pediatrician called Dr Specialist directly and they assured me we would make this happen. I was ready to make like my friend Megan and have a full blown sit-in till they gave us the referral! Ha ha!
Well longer story longer, on top of this, the practice manager got our strongly worded letter about the situation. He called to say that he'd also received word about all the phone calls from people advocating for us like the "nice assistant", the pediatrician, the case manager etc and he promised the referral paperwork should be complete tomorrow by noon!
God is so very good and trusting Him is always in our best interest. His plan is even better than my plan. His control is always better than me controlling the situation and whether I can believe it or not, HE LOVES HER MORE THAN ME - so of course He's gonna work this out.
And yes, you guessed it....
SOB SOB SOB
(I got this from my girl Whitney who is having her transplant this week)