Sunday, June 20, 2010


Tomorrow life officially changes.  I'm off to work!  It's the first time I've had a full time job since I was 18 yrs old, so I guess it's about time.  I can honestly say that staying home with my kids for the last 10 years is a gift that I would never exchange for any amount of money in the world.  I know that not everyone has the opportunity to do that and I'm blessed to have been able to.  But now I'm realizing that possibly I can enhance our family all the more by going back to work.  Isaac and I have some real goals that we'd like to accomplish, not to mention an ever growing medical tab so it only makes sense.  Xander will be able to start preschool this year and so officially my kids will all be school age and so this seems the logical thing to do.

I won't lie... I bawled my head of Friday night for 2 whole hours at the thought of leaving my baby boy because he's never been away from  me.  For the my older kids it's no big deal because they are used to it already from going to school.  But when Xander grabbed my face, starred up at me with his big black eyes  and said, "I'm sure gonna miss you Mama." It was all over - the tears started and didn't stop till I fell asleep. What a bawl baby! I'm just so thankful that my kids will be with their Daddy 90% of the time I'm gone due to his schedule and I've hired someone to come to the house and help out for only 7-8 hours a week.  How can I beat that right?
(img via google images)
So it's evening now and my super healthy lunch is all packed, my water bottle filled, my SPARK ready to keep me going oh and a really cute outfit all laid out.  
And all I can think and pray is...
please don't let 9 hours feel like 29 hours!
please let my children be at peace about me leaving
please Lord give me supernatural wisdom, memory and knowledge to do my best
please let me be a light in the darkness
and most of all...